What lengths will people go through to get a job? For me, I try a variety of things: I tell jokes in my cover letters, with a bold claim that I am full of dad jokes for any occasion; I submit pictures of me partaking in activities that relate to the company (see exhibit A to the left—me drinking a local brew down in Raleigh, NC at a wedding while sitting on a rock; it was an attempt to get someone from Quaker City Mercantile to at least respond to my submissions); and I try to kiss ass.
At any given time 8-10 years ago, I would have gotten a response. Most likely “no”, but a response nonetheless. And most of these responses were personal—in the sense that someone took the time to write out “no” in so many words and sent it off. Now I’m lucky if I get just an automated response.
Why is it so hard to get a job these days? Or even just a response. Places like URBN (parent company to Urban Outfitters, Nuuly, BHLDN, Anthropologie, Terrain and URBN Food and Beverage) has their careers webpage set up as a serve yourself spot where you search the jobs, apply, and then come back to see where you’re at in their queue. In the 8 or so jobs I’ve applied to with them, just this morning I earned another notch on my reject belt but there are two jobs on there (one I applied to in April and one in October) that seem to be stuck with the “In progress” message following it. I attended an information session last week on Temple’s main campus for URBN and the internships and FT roles they’re hiring for. I then attended an “interview” in the same place the next day. It wasn’t what I thought it would be, but it gained me a connection to the inside world of URBN.
I want to work in advertising or branding and identity. Bonus points if I land in an agency that rolls all of that into one. I’m getting a bit desperate, though. So much so, that even though I swore off working in EGD ever again, I applied to an architect’s office in the city where their job description fit like a glove with my actual experience. A laughable moment was when I announced I applied to Interior Architects to my boyfriend who, without skipping a beat, opened his eyes wide and said, “What if you get hired?”
“Well, babe, if I get hired, that means I have a job.” Duh.
The convo then went into the whole thing about me escaping EGD-land and doing my own thing, working where I know I’ll be happy. But when getting a business off the ground has taken a hiatus, you’ve been out of work for a few months and your savings is dwindling (bills don’t pause, y’all) and you’re a 30-something creative who needs medical benefits and would happily take a 401k with some steady pay, you begin to lower your standards a bit and look in places you don’t really want to be in.
So this begs the question, how does Senpai notice me? I began tailoring my resume to read the way I need it for specific jobs, create new sample PDF portfolios as additional collateral for each application, and write cover letters that sometimes make me want to barf due to the high level of ass-kissing I do just to get a response.
The cockblockers in this game are third party software/websites larger (and smaller) places use to help offset the number of applicants they get for any given position that’s posted. If your resume or cover letter don’t contain the words they’re looking for, actual human eyes will never lay on your submission. You’ll never be noticed.
I contemplated doing it the old school way for a while: dropping into studios with leave-behinds (portfolio sample, resume, business card) or using actual physical mail methods to send in my stuff… The problem is, a lot of studios and agencies are really weird with unexpected guests and because a lot of them use that third party software or app that takes the place of having to pay someone to do it using actual manhours, I feel like it would be a surefire way for my stuff to be thrown into the wastebin.
So as it stands, I’m still trudging along, trying to talk to people when I can to make connections, attending AIGA events when I’m available (and it’s free) and stalking career pages and job boards. One day, Senpai will . notice me and I’ll be the happiest 30-something creative with a 401k and steady pay.
